This Space for Rent

Well, I've officially decided to give up blogging. Unofficially, the decision had already been made since I haven't posted anything in way too long. I simply have nothing to offer now. I'm not giving up on my writing.....it just may be a while before I can throw myself back into it the way I want to. I know my many, many readers will be vastly disappointed (uhh...hi Andrea and Tessa). I'll be transforming back into my former lurk mode and silently cheering on the other writers as I read their blogs and websites, envious yet inspired by their journies, struggles and successes. I'll miss you guys!

Don't Forget the Milk

"Hi. I am Another Aspiring Author," she wrote typing slowly. She stared off into space for several long minutes. "I have nothing to say except it is Monday, March 10, 2008." She clears her throat loudly. "Ahem. Milk, bread, macaroni and cheese, dishwashing liquid, 100-watt light bulbs, lemon heads, mint chocolate chip ice cream......."

You ever get the feeling your characters are doing nothing more than reading off a metaphoric grocery list of items you want them to say without any real action behind it? That's pretty much where I am now with my book. They walk, they talk, they nod, they shrug, etc but I'm not sure if it's just words or actual story progression. I'm writing through this feeling because who am I to quibble with progression of any sort? I had typed the sentence "I'm still only writing a handful of words at a time" but after re-reading it realized that's not the mindset I need to be in. Rather, I should say "I am still writing" period. Exclamation point! (Bonus points to anyone who recognizes the slight nod to The Golden Girls) I'm actually right on the verge of an upcoming scene that should be not only creepy but a turning point for my characters. I'm excited about it and can't wait to see how it turns out.

On a side note, I just remembered I also need toilet paper and Twizzlers.

Bear Suits? Oh, My

I like to check out blog patrol several times a week (not every day, I swear) to see who's reading my blog (besides my mom and Andrea) and how they come to find me. Seeing as this is a blog about writing or at least my lackthereof, you would think readers might stumble across me through Google or Yahoo using writerly type words such as plot, characterization, tension, worldbuilding, the next Nora Roberts, etc. Unfortunately the biggest draw I seem to have so far are "movies with bear suits" and "how much does a writer make". The latter I can see, though I certainly don't have the answer as I will literally write for chocolate and water as long as someone wants to read it. The bear suit though I suppose is my own fault as I had posted a review of a Nicholas Cage movie AKA Bear Man. The Wicker Man will still live on as the worst movie I have ever seen and that's saying a lot. I like bad movies...hell I love them but they have to be of a certain badness that is enjoyable to watch. A particular favorite is an 80's movie (I can't think of the title) they play on SciFi Channel every so often about alien slugs from outer space who crawl in your ears and eat your brain. It is delightfully bad and I would highly recommend it. Speaking of slugs eating your brain, what precisely is this post about and how does it relate to writing? Umm...I'll have to get back to you on that.

The Dog Ate My Homework?

I'll have to admit straight out I didn't write this weekend. I have no excuse since I doubt you'll buy the one above. But what's so strange is I'm not beating myself up about it like usual. I think it's because I finally have that feeling of hope settled firmly inside that tells me I can write. The desire is back after all this time. The want to write was always there but not the burning desire that gives me those ever elusive butterflies. Not that I'm allowing this to give me permission to loll about like a slug (do slugs loll?). I know discipline is a necessity for a writer who wants to succeed, be it in being published or at least in finishing a book. Right now, my goal is to finish my book.....that and to eat some chocolate. I need at least one goal I can finish before the day is through.

Another quick post to proclaim to the world (and probably mostly to myself) that I'm still writing! Granted, I don't think Nora Roberts has anything to worry about, but I am still persevering in spite of myself. My characters are at present mostly just moving around mumbling lines to each other. But, at least they're moving and with them my story is progressing inch by inch forward. I've decided not to update my progress meter until next week as a kind of incentive to write more than I have been. We'll see what happens.

If You Write It They Will Come

Believe it or not, I actually wrote a bit this weekend. Okay, so maybe it was heavy on "a bit" but still writing. When I finished, I looked at my word count just to see if all those extra "actually, really, just, etc" type words I actually really just use way too much helped up my word count and found to my shock I had an overall count of 23,000 odd words. Now unless my multiplying like bunnies theory somehow came true (see previous post), something was seriously off. If you glance to the right, you can clearly see my progress meter is firmly entrenched at 3,905. Maybe my muse had come back while I was playing Dynomite on Yahoo and decide to finish up a few chapters for me? Unfortunately, nothing so dramatic. When I recently started writing again, I pulled out a previous book I had been working on before starting the new Paranormal Romance. This one too is a paranormal but without the romance. I've ingeniously titled it Ghost Story and it's been nagging at my brain for some time now. And the fact that I had completely forgotten about the Paranormal Romance I'd been blathering about for quite a while tells me maybe I was right to return to the previous book. Either that or I have schizophrenia. Actually just really, I'm okay with both.

Well, it took me three days but I managed to write a total of 664 words. This is quite a feat for me seeing as how the only writing I've been doing lately has been confined to my checkbook (damn bills). But I have learned something even through this minuscule amount of writing. A little is better than none and it just might be enough to get the creative blood pumping again. Maybe all I'll be able to manage for a while is a paragraph a day or even every two days, but at least I'm writing and that's what's important. Just glancing over and seeing my progress meter balancing so tantalizing on the edge of 4,000 total words fills me with joy because at least it's finally moving after months of inactivity. My muse may not have come back but that doesn't mean I have to wait around for her twiddling my thumbs (I tried twiddling my thumbs once and it really wasn't all that much fun).

Number of the Day

Just a short post to say that as of 1:45 p.m. (Eastern Standard Time, Check Local Listings), I have actually written 237 words! Oh, sure maybe that only totals up to a few short paragraphs, tiny actually seeing as how most of it is dialogue, but it still counts. And why you might ask am I here posting when I clearly should still be writing? Oh...uh...good point. Back to work!

Word of the Day

Persistent: Persisting, especially in spite of opposition, obstacles, discouragement; lasting or enduring tenaciously (courtesy of Dictionary.com).

Another Aspiring Author: She who is not persisting, especially in spite of opposition, obstacles, discouragement; lasting or enduring tenaciously.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I cannot seem to get myself together enough to write. And it's not about just being published for me (though that would be soooo nice). At this point, I'd just be happy to write again. I miss it. I miss the flluttery butterflies I get in my stomach when I sit down at my computer excited to find where my story will take me. I miss thinking about my characters and imagining things they might say as I go throughout my normal daily life. I miss the words falling from my fingertips and somehow arranging themselves on the page in ways I didn't know they would. And what's so sad about the whole thing is it's my own damn fault. I'm no busier than anyone else. It's about priorities and where I choose to place writing on my to do list. Perhaps I should be concentrating more on the what the word "commitment" means before "lazy author" becomes permanently affixed by my name in the dictionary.

The No Update Update

Well, here it is the first week of February, almost an entire month since I last posted. And what exciting and productive news do I have to report? If you guessed a big fat zero, you get a cookie. Go ahead, shove the whole thing in your mouth if you want....no one's looking. Actually, I haven't been completely useless the past few weeks. I did manage somehow to work up enough energy to write a whole sentence. Yep, you heard me, a complete sentence with nouns and verbs and other grammar type words. I guess I was hoping maybe they would mutiple like bunnies when I wasn't looking but alas this was not to be.

Still no postcard from my errant Muse. She's probably lying on a beach somewhere being served margaritas and chocolate by a cabana boy named Raoul. Tramp. Of course, if that were true, I don't suppose I'd be in a hurry to come home either.

Gone But Not Forgotten

I'm talking about my muse unfortunately. When I said in my last post that she had recently relocated to Siberia, I'm afraid I was being much too optimistic. I've now realized the fickle thing has actually gotten lost somewhere in the Bermuda Triangle. I was prepared to battle snow up to my eyeballs and 7-foot Yetis to reclaim her, but this is too much. *sigh* I'm truly at a loss. I suppose I could run an ad in the "Lost and Found" section of my local newspaper and see what happens. [Lost: Obstinate muse who never comes when called, is only barely paper trained, and answers to the name Her Royal Imperial Highness]. If anyone happens to see her, first kick her in the shins for me then tell her she's sorely missed.

This is for TessaD

The top five reasons I haven't updated my blog in more than a month:

1. I've been busy compiling this list naturally.
2. Ever since Britney lost custody of her kids, I haven't been able to put two words together.
3. I've been working on solving not only all of the world's socioeconomic problems but thought I'd give world peace a shot while I was at it. Of course, I can't even control my own road rage, so this may take a while.
4. I bought a new Nancy Drew computer game and can't possibly blog while the Case of the Crystal Skull remains unsolved. Whatever would the Hardy Boys think of me?
5. My muse has recently relocated to Siberia and I'm currently saving up for a plane ticket and one of those furry hats.

Just a short post to send out a "WAHOO!!!!" to TessaD who a mere few days ago got The Call! No, not that annoying one from Verizon asking if you want to upgrade your phone service....The Call....the one where your dreams come true :) Congratulations Tessa!!

I'm Back - Sort of

It's been quite a while since I last posted for reasons that lean toward my natural inclination of the whiny so we'll bypass them. I wish I had more to report from a writing standpoint, but I haven't even thought of my WIP in the past month except for the occasional pang of guilt for not having written so much as a period in all this time. I think my progress meter has plans of suing me for neglect and abandonment. I'm heartily ashamed. I'm just not ready to write yet. Even in spite of all my pep talks and self recriminations, I just can't do it. Defeatist attitude, I know, but that's where I am at the moment. *sigh* I don't even have a witty one-liner to end this post with (damn it, but I did manage to end it with a preposition).

I Don't Have To Like You

I've been thinking a lot lately about what makes a character whose morals lean obviously more on the ambigious side likeable or if not likeable at least fascinating to follow. And since I spend a much more embarrassing amount of time watching television than I do reading, of course I'm going to use TV as an example. There are two shows in particular that caught my attention with their previews: Damages on FX and Saving Grace on Lifetime. Both feature strong female characters as their leads and both characters are certainly not heroines in the typical sense that we think of them. They're not even nice half of the time.

On Damages, we have Glenn Close who plays a hardnosed lawyer who seldom ever loses a case and will go to just about any lengths to see this doesn't happen. And I'm not talking about your everyday underhanded tactics either. In the very first episode, she has someone's pet killed to manipulate a witness into testifying for her. I was horrified. And yet I couldn't stop watching. Yes, she had this ugly, heartless side to her. And then cut scene to her at home with her family and you find she's just as single-minded and forceful there too. But, there is a glimmer of warmth that shines through this hard exterior hinting at something deeper underneath. The interactions she has with her son especially drew me in because it's so easy to feel her frustration in dealing with an obviously troubled child compounded by the fact that she can't steamroll over him like she does everyone else in her professional life. She's not likeable in the normal sense but I love watching to see what she'll do next.

And then we have Saving Grace. Okay, this is not going to be as thoughtful because quite frankly it was all I could do to get through the first episode. Grace is guilty of all your normal sins i.e. smoking, drinking, sex, running stop signs, ripping the tags off mattresses, double-dipping the guacamole at parties, etc. I didn't like her from the second she came on screen and she's not even the worst of the two. She was being bad just because she could. Okay, maybe that's not fair. She does have some deep dark pain about a sister who had passed way, but by the time they got to this part (which I honestly can't recall the details of) I just didn't care what made her act the way she did. It's a highly rated show from what I could tell so yet again maybe this is just another purely subjective thing.

In the case of Damages, Glenn Close isn't really the heroine or the villian of the story. Somehow she manages to be a mixture of both (I'd give you a fractional amount here but math makes my head hurt). I think that's why her character is so fascinating. She's not really likeable but she's compelling and that's what matters the most. And yes, this is television we're talking about and a lot of credit naturally belongs to Ms. Close for bringing this character to life. But what are books but mini movies in our heads (oh dear, God, I hope it's not just me). I touched on this topic in a previous post about having a heroine who's not all that likeable. I guess I don't really have anything to add except the live technicolor example I listed above about what makes this work and what doesn't. Did I just say technicolor? I think maybe I need to get out of the house more.

The Legend Of Justin Bobby

Okay, if you're not a fan of The Hills the title will probably mean nothing to you. For the uninformed (hah!), it's basically a reality show that follows a group of well-to-do twentysomethings on their quest to.....ummm.....that is.....it's a reality show about a group of rich young people as they try to.....well...... see there's this young group of people who.......uh...actually I don't know what the hell the show is about. It's a show about nothing but not in the same cool way Seinfeld was about nothing. Literally, they sit around and stare at each other.....a lot........ in between a lot of boy/girl, girl/best friend, boy/girl/best friend drama. That clear it up for you? Oh well. All you really need to know is one of the secondary characters (though it's a reality show, characters are definitely what they are, in my opinion anyway) Audrina is going through her own boy/girl drama with said drama starring the aforementioned Justin Bobby. Think about the really cute guy who used to live next door to you....okay now picture his slightly creepy, dirty-haired, younger brother. That's Justin Bobby. His only good points so far are the ability to burp at inappropriate moments and dispense fortune cookie wisdom to an enraptured Audrina. Poor girl. I don't think she could get a clue if Colonel Mustard himself hand-delivered it to her...in the conservatory......with a candlestick.

So, you may be wondering, what has this got to do with writing? I'm so glad you asked. Besides Justin Bobby's other obvious talents, he did get me to thinking about secondary characters and their relevance or lack thereof in a good story whether it be television, movies, or books. They can serve to balance out our hero/heroine by shedding some light into a side of their personality we might not otherwise see, other times they can help drive the main plot along, or sometimes they even star in their own subplots. Ah, but here is where Justin Bobby comes in. What if instead of helping all they end up doing is inviting themselves over, cleaning out your fridge, and running up your cable bill ordering WWE Smackdowns? Okay, I have no proof that Justin Bobby is guilty of such things but I can only imagine what happens when the cameras stop rolling. But I digress. I've thought about my own past manuscripts...okay one completed manuscript and several in progress, and wondered how well my secondary characters held up under close scrutiny. To be honest, most of them were not really all that well thought out. They just inserted themselves into the story as I went along and before I knew it had gone from bit player to bona fide sidekick/secondary character. One of them even ended up becoming a significant plot point for one of my main characters that I hadn't intended in the beginning. This worked well in some cases and in others they are in apparent need of some fleshing out. There is at least one definite Justin Bobby in the bunch that should I ever decide to continue on that manuscript again, I would have to rethink.

And so what have we learned at the end of this somewhat rambling post? Clearly I'm in desperate need of some Masterpiece Theater.

I Think I Need to Get A Life

Over at Christopher Park's blog he was discussing the importance of constructing an author's bio. He linked to Anne Mini's website where she breaks down what actually makes for a good bio. Yikes. I hadn't seriously thought of this before mostly because I am nowhere near to sending out a manuscript to anyone who would care how witty and articulate my life has been thus far. But still, seeing as how I'm currently not writing on my WIP, I thought I'd take it as a form of writing exercise. Here's a few of Ms. Mini's (I just love saying that) points:

1. A bio should be an entertaining overview of the author’s background, an approximately 200-250 word description of your writing credentials, relevant experience, and educational attainments, designed to make you sound like a person whose work would be fascinating to read. Uh, I grew up in a small town in Ohio, went to community college, and write under the pseudonym of Nora Roberts?
2. Start with whatever fact is most relevant to the book at hand...... Seeing as how my current WIP is about monsters, I suppose I could mention my lifelong romance with Bigfoot. I'm not sure it's going to work out though. Ever since The Enquirer outed his lair in Butte, Montana, he never calls anymore.
3. You will also want to include some of your quirks and background oddities, especially if they are relevant to the book. If my quirks and oddities aren't apparent by now, I'm certainly not going to list them.
4. Mention any past publications (in general terms), columns, lecturing experience, readings, as well as what you were doing for a living at the time that you wrote the book. Well, there was that letter to the Editor I wrote for the Sunday paper extolling the virtues of chocolate as a medicinal vitamin and how it's about time the health care system started paying for it.
5. You need not limit yourself to your professional achievements, either, in your quest to sound interesting. Adding a quirky hobby often works well, as long as it is true....So I guess it's okay to mention my weekend forays into iguana tossing. Hah! I knew I wasn't disturbed....just interesting.

Upon further reflection, I don't suppose I'm quite ready to write my bio quite yet.

Nicholas Cage....Bear Suit....Oh My!

Warning: The following post was written well over a week ago and most likely makes no sense whatsoever. It's been a long few weeks here in anotheraspiringauthor land and I'm frankly too tired to think of something else. You have been warned.

It's been some time since I've posted one of my famous (okay, maybe famous only to me) hopelessly outdated movie reviews. And boy is this ever a doozy. I watched The Wicker Man last night and now can only wish I'd listened to my inner voice and turned it to the Paint Drying Channel instead. I have six words for you: Nicholas Cage in a bear suit. That pretty much sums it up. Oh, you need more? Well, I suppose if I must, though I seriously doubt I'll be able to do justice to this truly horrible movie. And what's so sad about the whole thing is there was some definite potential for a good story. Nicholas Cage (hereafter dubbed Bear Man) plays a California cop who pulls over a station wagon for the terrible offence of a baby doll accidentally falling from the roof of their car. He stops them on a dangerous hill and proceeds to lecture the mother and daughter about safety, blah, blah, bratty blonde girl tosses the doll back into the street, blah, blah, blah he goes after it and then the station wagon is creamed by a semi-truck for no apparent reason. And let me tell you, the blah, blah, blahs were probably the best part. He mopes around for several days until out of the blue he receives a letter from an ex-fiancee begging him for help to find her missing daughter. Though he hasn't heard from her in many years, and though anyone with half a brain, let alone a supposed experienced police man, can see that not only is the daughter in question his daughter but the letter is also an apparent set-up, he drops everything and rushes up to Washington State where he has absolutely no jurisdiction to help his damsel in distress. He flies out to remote obviously female-dominated island where he proceeds to flash his badge around and yell at anyone who will listen to him. Okay, frankly I'm boring even myself. Cut scene to annual festival where offerings are made to "The Goddess" to provide good crops for the coming year (apparently grocery stores are in short supply here) and everyone running around in animal costumes (hence the bear suit) and the errant daughter finally being located. Bear Man eventually figures out what we've known for hours: ex-fiancee has tricked him into coming to the island to become the "real sacrifice" for the ritual. The only true satisfaction I received at this point was watching him burn to death inside the head of the 10-story "Wicker Man" as he screams like a girl for several long minutes. Now, normally I'm not this bloodthirsty but take my word for it: He had it coming. I read on IMDb that this is actually a remake of a 1973 Edward Woodward (loved The Equalizer) movie. Maybe I should have rented that instead.

And so at the end of all this what have I learned? I had to walk away from this bad movie with something didn't I? Naturally. It did make me think about my current WIP and making sure it contains no Nicholas Cage in a beart suit moments i.e. plot twists that just scream slap me upside the face with it why don't you? This book is my first "real" attempt at a carefully thought out plot and I'm not sure how adept I'll be at gentle foreshadowing, etc. In the meantime, I've officially sworn off all Nicholas Cage movies. I still haven't forgiven him for Ghost Rider, but The Wicker Man was definitely much, much worse.

How Another Aspiring Author Got Her Groove Back

Well, no, as nice as it would be there unfortunately was no hunky, obscenely, younger man involved. Give me a minute to lament that fact for just a while ::time passes with some truly woeful sighing:: Okay, got that out of my system....for now anyway. And truthfully I haven't gotten my groove completely back but I'm working on it. I've been slowly making some changes in my work life that I hope will be more conducive to creativity in my writing life. This is taking some time, but I can feel freedom already starting to tickle my brain (maybe that explains the random outbursts of laughter that have strangers giving me wide berth lately). I know I can't wait for the perfect situation in which to write. However, I certainly can do my damnedest to make life a bit easier on myself. I want to write. I need to write. I've just felt so spent lately emotionally I barely have much left to give even to the blog. Well, hell. That was certainly dramatic wasn't it? I need to get over myself and just do what I know I need to do. Sitting around waiting for things to change have done nothing to further my writing or further myself as both an author and as a person. I know this. Maybe saying it out loud, yet again, will finally get it through to the other voices in my head. They could even stage a group intervention and kick my ass into gear.

Btw, a huge congratulations to Tessa Dare for signing with an agent! Here is a wonderful example of an author who has not only the talent but the perseverance and drive to become a bestselling author. I have no doubt in a very short time, we will be seeing one of her books gracing the shelves of our favorite bookstores. Way to go Tessa!

You Can't Judge a Book By It's Cover - Unless It's Harry Potter

I've seen a lot of reviews lately about one of the paranormal romances I'd recently read that had a heroine I just didn't care for. The book is actually getting good reviews for the most part, but that's not what caught my attention. It was the fact that they referred to it, not as a romance, but as urban fantasy. Okay, color me befuddled. Maybe this distinction doesn't matter to some people but it makes a big difference to me. I like romance. I even like romance mixed in with vampires and other of the walking undead or not quite human whatnots (I think that's the technical term anyway). But urban fantasy is a horse of a different color (what do you know - I got to work in a Wizard of Oz reference). And I don't mean by that that I wouldn't read it. However, I would have different expectations going in than say a traditional or semi-traditional romance. In my opinion, most of their worlds are a darker place to roam and accordingly their heroes/heroines are too. The rules of romance -- or at least the ones I personally like to read -- are also sometimes different. Boy + girl = happilyeverafter isn't the case as much anymore. Of course a big part of that might be the increasing number of series we now have following the same character in a several book arc. Personally, I don't get it. After investing a few days of reading with these characters I want, no demand, my happilyeverafter. I don't like to be kept dangling. I love when other characters from the book get their own spin-offs but the main hero and heroine need to end up on a happy cloud of floating bliss. Call me an optimist or a dreamer but damn it that's why I read in the first place. I realize I'm probably in the minority on this as it's purely a matter of personal preference. And of course they're going to shelve these books under the Romance section where they'll get the most notice. I suppose as an aspiring author I should be more aware of these distinctions. *sigh* Here I am 30+ years old and still have to do my homework.